Gnolly!

Ze stories uf ze fearsome Gnome varrior, Gnolly! Unt Gnonest.

Friday, June 03, 2005

Vhy don't you make a list?!?!

Ze people ve try to help zumtimes get on my nerves. I mean, ve try to be nice, ve try to help zem, especially ze down unt out vuns. However, it vould be nice if zey keep in mind zere are lots uf people who needs ze help uf fearsome Gnomes. I mean, ve are very busy, killink ze monsters, gettink ze golt, unt minink ze tin (I luff tin!). If you vant us to help you, it's best if you make us a list uf ze zinks you'd like us to do.

Vhy just ze ozer day, ve vere vanderink in ze swamp, unt zis guy asks, "My vagon is broken down, unt ze animals are scarink me. Vould you please kill some uf zem for me?"

"Hokay", ve say, unt proceed to kill ze "scary" animals.

"Oh, zank you!", he said, "Vhile you're out, vould you mind to find ze lost vuns, unt get zomezink from zem too?"

Vould it heff been so hard to say, "I em an idiot who has brought ze vagon into ze swamp. Please rescue me by killink a bunch uf ze animals, unt if you heppen to see any lost vuns, ask zem for my stuff beck. Zank you."? Instead, ve heff to finish killink (unt killink a bunch uf ze lost vuns as vell in ze process, as zey are eferyvhere in zat swamp. More on zis later) before he tells us about ze stuff. Efen vorse, efter ve got his stuff beck, he says, "Oh, zank you, brave Gnomes. Vould you mind also gettink me zum vood to fixink my vagon? Nice vood please, please import it from zumvhere, I don't like ze domestic."

Bah. Ze lazy human! Should heff fed him to ze spiders in ze voods.

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